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November 29, 2021
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How Can You Trust Anyone Else When You Don't Trust Yourself?
LISTEN TO THE PODCAST EPISODE NOW:
I get asked all the time about “who to trust in the music business”.
And I’ve said this many times before but today I”m going to dedicate an episode to it because I think it’s that important.
No matter what you do from here on out. The most important person to trust is yourself!
I’ve talked before about coaching and how I’ve had clients tell me that initially they were doing the coaching exercises and following through with showing up every week so as to not disappoint me.
And then there sort of becomes a shift where they started showing up so as to not disappoint themselves. This is a very very important mindset shift.
The reason being is that if you don’t have this mindset and operate in this mindset the easiest person to disappoint is yourself.
But it often comes with the BIGGEST consequences.
You don’t stick to your plans, you don’t follow through, you don’t have any self-trust, your self-esteem often falls away and there is a cycle of self-deterioration.
Self-Trust is KEY!
Let me ask you now, how much do you fully trust yourself to follow through with or stay on track with something that might or will change your future, or help you reach some goals.
Maybe you want to become healthier and eat better, and you start but in 3 days time you fall right off that new routine, can you get back on? Can you trust that your commitment to yourself is bigger that the desire to want to eat junk food?
Usually the trade off is seaking instant pleasure in the moment, whatever the thing is that you are or aren’t doing.
Are you more likely to binge netflix than work out or go for a walk?
Are you more likely to start a new business and let it go when it’s gets really tough to reach your goals?
The deciding factor in all of these things is how much you value your self-trust and how much you have?
The only way that you can grow your self-trust is to start following through with things now. It builds self-confidence. If you were being honest now and wrote down a list of 10 things that you want to do and then you wrote beside it how likely you were to follow that task through on a scale of 1-10 (1 being not even really getting off the ground, 5 being you get half-way and stop, and 10 being – never give up and never stop) What would those numbers be?
Chances are that it will differ for each task, not all are the same, some are much easier mentally for you to follow through on. But look at the ones that are a 5 and ask yourself when will be the time when you decide that you can follow it through?
My husband always gets nervous when I come up with an idea because he says “I know you’ll do it!” you won’t not do it. I haven’t always been perfect in that pursuit as a matter of fact I think I’ve left more unfinished business on the table in my lifetime than finished business.
However here is the kicker!!!! You would be surprised if you change this one mindset – start trusting yourself and following through how quickly your situation will change. You could have left 100’s of unfinished tasks, businesses, ideas, thoughts, plans on the table and if you make the decision today to follow through with just one plan, it will change your trajectory.
Until pretty soon you have followed through on many plans, and you feel confident and secure in your own abilities to trust that you WILL do those things, goals get accomplished.
If you’re coming up with dozens of reasons why you haven’t followed through all being outside of you – money, time, people, circumstance, then I ask you to really examine whether 100% of those are truly roadblocks that couldn’t have been steered around at any time or are some of those purely excuses that kept you safe from sticking your neck out.
SELF-TRUSTing people follow through.
Self-trusting people don’t self-sabotage or self-punish
Self-trusting people show themselves compassion for their past actions so that they can heal, self-forgive and more forward.
Self-trusting people have a companion in themselves that is constant, stable and loving!
To be self-trusting you must have a pretty good awareness of your self-talk and your thoughts.
I have coached a lot of people who will tell me out of the gate, I just don’t trust that I”m going to do it. I have a history not following through. I need more confidence in myself otherwise I’ll just find a reason to not do it.
It’s not always easy to put into action these concepts, but it is changing!
That’s why having a coach or someone who have show you your patterning and help you move to a new model of thinking or acting is so key.
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